Chances are you have a social butterfly at school.You will never catch a social butterfly sitting at home alone on a Friday night because they are comfortable with everyone.They are confident and cheerful.How do they make it look so easy?It's hard to believe, especially if you're naturally shy or introverted, but with a little work you can become a social butterfly.
Step 1: You can mingle with different crowds.
If you want to interact with all of them, you have to identify the school's cliques.Don't limit yourself to a few people.The key to being a social butterfly is being able to move from one situation to another with ease, so the more groups you are friendly with, the easier that becomes.Being friendly with a variety of people expands your social circle and gives you the chance to attend a lot of different events.This leads to more meetings with new people.You can see results if you put yourself out there.
Step 2: Put yourself in the spotlight.
Being a social butterfly doesn't mean you have to initiate every conversation.People will learn your name and recognize you if you put yourself in the spotlight.They start conversations with you instead of the other way around.You can participate in the class.If you want to start a club, join it.Run for student council.If you put yourself in situations that cause other people to notice you, they will.Being in the spotlight can introduce you to new groups of people.
Step 3: At lunch, sit with different people.
Everyone has a group of people they usually sit with at lunch.You don't have to abandon your friends, but after you chat with them, you can say hello to other people.Don't just wander up to random tables.If it feels natural to do so, have reasons to initiate conversations and then stick around for a chat or light-hearted exchange with their group.Asking one of them about a homework assignment is a simple reason for approaching a group.Keep the exchange casual and don't make it complicated.If there are any awkward silences, make a quick exit and don't stay more than a few minutes.
Step 4: Accept invitations and make plans.
Your social circle won't truly expand until you start developing your relationships with new friends.Ask someone from class if they want to study or do homework after school, or make plans with a new pal to see the movie you talked about at lunch last week.If you get an invitation to hang out or attend an event, make every effort to do so.If it is feasible, get out there and socialize!
Step 5: Follow school events.
You can meet a lot of people at different events if you keep up with what is happening at school.It is inevitable that you will meet new people, create bonds, and widen your social circle if you attend a basketball game, volunteer to help organize prom, or check out the theater group's new play.You will be that social butterfly before you know it.
Step 6: Don't forget the names.
Make it a point to remember that person when you meet them.If you have to, write down the person's name.Say hello and use their name the next time you see them.It sounds small, but people feel important when they hear their own names.Sprinkle their first name in a few times when you are talking to someone.It should be done smoothly and simply.Say things like, "Hello, Erin!"One of the easiest ways to get someone's attention is by using their name, and it makes them feel respected and remembered.Don't use a nickname and use the name that someone gives you.If someone introduces himself as Robert, don't call him Rob or Bob unless he invites you to.If you are unsure of the pronunciation of someone's name, don't hesitate to say it.If I am not pronouncing that right, please let me know.
Step 7: Give genuine praise.
Don't say things to feed someone's ego or get their attention.A person can feel that you mean it when you compliment them honestly.The person will feel flattered and remember you for it.It's a good idea to notice the small things about others and point them out.Combine a compliment with a question to start a conversation.Try something more specific like, "Your hair looks so good today!" instead of "You look really pretty today."Where did you get that shade of lipstick?
Step 8: Relate to others.
One of the best ways to make friends is to relate to someone you are talking to.The feeling of sharing something is created when you steer a conversation in a direction that allows you to relate to someone.It forms a kind of bond between the two of you, even if it is a small one.Someone you want to know better is talking before class about not understanding last night's homework.Say something like, "I didn't understand it either!" to join the conversation.I am definitely going to ask the teacher about it today.
Step 9: Look at it.
You won't be interested in everything people say to you.It isn't possible.Make an effort to appear interested in the conversations you are having.To show that person you are listening to them, smile, nod, and ask a simple question.They will feel closer to you if you are willing to listen to what they have to say.Sometimes people need to be heard.
Step 10: Enjoy the conversation.
Getting in the habit of small talk and chatting takes practice, but don't let it become an empty gesture.When appropriate, make jokes, and talk about topics that interest you.You will find that chatting with others is much easier, and both of you will start looking forward to future conversations with one another.
Step 11: Prepare your opening statement.
The hardest part of making new friends is breaking the ice.If you want to introduce yourself to others, you should work on a generic, simple routine.If you include a question in your introduction, the other person will have a conversation with you even if it is a short one.It's helpful to practice your introduction in your head, but you need to do it on actual people.If you don't feel prepared to speak to someone, go home that night and think about what you want to say the next day.
Step 12: Look happy!
Try to start conversations with a smile even if you are nervous.It makes the other person feel friendly with you.It is not a good idea to walk up to someone with a blank or scared expression on their face and make them feel nervous about what you are about to say to them.If you approach someone with a relaxed demeanor and easy smile, they will want to know what you are going to say.
Step 13: You should watch your body language.
Maintaining a relaxed demeanor is probably going to make you feel a little nervous.When interacting with people, always make eye contact.Stand straight up, since that makes you feel uncomfortable.It will take a little practice, but once you start making it a point to keep your body language relaxed and confident, it will become second nature to you.
Step 14: First, bond on social media.
Making friends with someone on Facebook first can be a great way to start a face-to-face conversation later.Don't try to be stalker-ish with your interactions.Like their status or a picture that they post.If they post an article, link, song, or anything else that you find interesting, you can either share it on your wall or repost it.If you pay attention to what the person is into, you can approach them and talk about the band you both like or the movie you want to see.It's important to keep interactions on social media simple.Heavy topics and excessive comments can get distorted online without the aid of a facial expression and tone of voice for interpretation.Social media can be used to plan a hang-out session.If someone posts a video of a band you like, you can approach them and say, "I saw that you enjoy such-and-such band, too!"The foundation of almost every friendship is the shared interests.
Step 15: Get over your fears.
What is holding you back from being a social butterfly?Do you shy?Are you new at school?Afraid others will reject you?It's not good at small talk.If you identify it, you can eliminate it by facing it dead on.When you walk up to them, focus on what you want to say instead of what people will say.When you are thinking about making a major life change, you will feel a little vulnerable and will experience some self-doubt.This is normal.List all the reasons why you want to expand your social circle and revisit it when you feel less confident.Put the scenarios out of your mind.No one knows what the future will be, so you waste time fretting over what ifs.
Step 16: You should leave your comfort zone.
If you want to expand your social circle, you need to start putting yourself in situations that you aren't used to.Work your way up to bigger things if you start expanding your horizon in small ways.Pick a few events that you wouldn't normally go to but are interested in, and check them out.At this stage, you don't have to be the life of the party.You are getting used to it.When you go out and do something new, remember that triumphant feeling.It's easier to go to new places if you bring a friend with you.You will have someone to talk to when you are first starting out, and it will make it easier for you to transition into a different frame of mind.
Step 17: The goals should be set.
The process of becoming a social butterfly takes time.You may be set up for failure if you go in expecting to change overnight.You can achieve and feel good about it if you set small goals.Try for things like going to one place you have never been to before and introducing yourself to two new people every week.If you want to accomplish your goals, cross them off of your list.This will help you focus on what you need to do and give you a sense of accomplishment.If you don't meet all of your goals in a particular week, you should not be hard on yourself.No one is keeping score.Break it down into smaller parts that are easier to achieve if you set a goal that you can't seem to accomplish at first.If you want to get invited to a party but it doesn't happen right away, try simplification.Make it your new goal to chat with the host of the party at lunch that week and start saying hello in the hallways.
Step 18: Start your day with good vibes.
You can tell yourself that you are awesome by looking in the mirror.If you put a sticky note on your alarm clock with a positive message on it, it will be the first thing you see when you wake up.It doesn't have to be complicated, something as simple as "Today will be a good day!" can make all the difference.You can do things that make you feel good, like playing your favorite song on the way to school.It is important to eat a good breakfast to face the day.
Step 19: Don't be afraid of your new self.
You have to embrace a new you if you want to change things.Don't let your past define you.Make your negative perception work for you.Maybe you like to read.If you use that to your advantage, you will be able to socialize about books more easily.You can join a book club at school.If you notice who is participating in class, sit by them and talk about the book you are reading.It is easier to make new friends when you are talking about something that interests you.
Step 20: Be patient.
If you are not seeing results right away, don't get discouraged.It takes time to make new friends.It takes many small actions to make a big change.You will find that the rest will unfold naturally if you focus on reaching out to new people and broadening your horizon.