It can be difficult to deal with a parent with an eating disorder.Ensuring that your needs are met helps you cope with your parent's eating disorder.If you want to manage your emotions, you need to relieve stress, build a support network, and possibly see a therapist.You will be able to talk to your parent about their illness.
Step 1: Practice self care.
You might not be able to get what you need because your parent is focused on their illness.To make sure that your needs are met, create a schedule that includes eating healthy meals, bathing, cleaning your living space, and going to work or school.Do something nice for yourself.It is possible to plan what you will eat and when in order to have a well-stocked kitchen.You can model healthy eating habits for your parent.It is important that you take care of your own needs when dealing with difficult circumstances, such as a parent with an eating disorder.
Step 2: Tell your parent what you need.
It is common for people with an eating disorder to focus on it.Keep in mind that your parent is not doing this on purpose.Be specific about what you want them to do and remind them that you need them there for you.It's possible that you need your parent to be there for you.You might need them to take care of chores, help you with homework, or get things for you.You could say, "I need you to be there for me when I'm dealing with stuff at school" or "Dad, I miss spending time with you."We can enjoy a new hobby together.
Step 3: When you need help, ask for it from others.
Your parent might not be able to help you with the ED.Reach out to someone you trust, like a friend or relative.Tell them what you need and ask them to help.There is never anything to eat in our house because my mom stopped buying us groceries.We need food for this week.
Step 4: You don't want to focus on your parent if you have a life outside your home.
It is easy to get so focused on your parent's needs that they become the center of your life.This can affect your mental health and put too much pressure on you.If you want to have a full life, build relationships and hobbies outside of your home.Work on your personal goals so you can focus on a bright future.You could join a recreational sports team.You could start a new hobby or pursue your dream job.
Step 5: It's a good idea to schedule fun into your day.
Dealing with an eating disorder can make you feel stressed or upset.Incorporating more fun into your life will make you feel better.Do something fun every day if you make a list of fun things you enjoy.Host a game night with your friends or family, go bowling, take a walk, read a book, engage in a hobby, play sports, do something creative, or watch a movie.
Step 6: You can incorporate stress relief into your day.
Too much stress can be harmful, even though it's a normal part of life.It is important that you learn to manage stress because it is likely caused by your parent's illness.Try to figure out what works best for you.Do a stress relief on a daily basis to help you cope.Taking a warm bath, coloring in an adult coloring book, writing in a journal, and vent to a friend are some of the things that can be done.
Step 7: You need a support system to deal with your parent's illness.
When you need support, identify friends and family members who will be there for you.When you are feeling overwhelmed, reach out to talk.Ask trusted friends or relatives to speak up if they think you need more help.You could say, "I'm feeling really upset right now."I know this is taking a toll on me, can I text you when I need to vent?Will you step in and help if I'm upset?
Step 8: Family members of people with ED can join a support group.
It can be difficult to deal with someone you love being sick.A support group can connect you with other people who are going through the same thing you are.You can search online for a group in your area.Attend meetings to learn from others.If your parent is in recovery, the treatment team may be able to help you find a support group.
Step 9: If you are having trouble dealing with your emotions, talk to a therapist.
It is okay if you are struggling to cope with your parent's illness.A therapist can help you process your feelings and teach you how to change them.You can ask your doctor to refer you to a therapist.If you have to ask your parent to go to therapy, say, "I need help dealing with my emotions right now."Can I see a therapist?
Step 10: You should learn more about their eating disorder.
It can be hard to understand why your parent does certain things.At times, it seems like they could just stop.Anorexia is a serious mental health condition that is difficult to overcome.To understand the symptoms and causes of your parent's ED, read about their condition online or talk to your doctor.Remember that your parent isn't choosing the ED.It will take time for them to get better.
Step 11: They can take their mind off their ED by doing something after meals.
It can be difficult for someone with an eating disorder to eat.They might be worried about what they ate or tempted to burn calories.If you can get your parent to do something with you, they will be less focused on what they did or didn't eat.You can invite them to check out materials from the library or play a board game with them.Ask again after the next meal.
Step 12: It won't help if you blame or shame your parent.
If your parent hurts you, you might feel really mad.You may think that pointing out their flaws will make them feel bad, but this is usually not the case.Do not shame or blame your parent for their behavior.You could be tempted to say something like, "I needed you yesterday but all you care about is counting calories," or "You should feel bad about not cooking meals for us."
Step 13: Don't discuss diet or body image concerns with your parent.
Dieting and body image issues can affect your parent's eating disorder.Do not discuss these topics with your parent.Change the subject if they bring them up.Don't speak to your parent about your diet or someone else's.Don't make statements like "I feel so fat today" or " Toby really gained a lot of weight" if your parent says something like, "Have you lost weight?"Is it possible to make plans together?
Step 14: Listen to it.
It's possible that your parent is dealing with personal issues.Listening can make them feel better.When they are talking, try to remember what they said back to them.Don't judge them, tell them you're there to support them.It sounds like you're overwhelmed at work.I won't judge you if you come to me upset about work.
Step 15: If your parent feels attacked, use "I" statements.
It is normal for your parent to be defensive when you talk about their eating disorder.Keep your statements focused on how you feel.Don't blame your parent.Do not state your experience.Say something like, "I feel sad when I see you weak from not eating" or " I feel hurt that you don't have the energy to go to my soccer games."
Step 16: Specific about the behaviors that concern you.
When your parent is sick, they might not realize that they are doing something harmful.They may be willing to listen to what you have to say.Tell them what behaviors alarm you.You could say that you don't eat regular meals because you run 5 miles every day.I am afraid you will get sick or hurt.
Step 17: It will cause their ED if they discuss their appearance.
You might be tempted to tell your parent that they look great.It can backfire if they shift their focus to their appearance.Right now, your parent's ED makes them see themselves as heavy, which can cause them to restrict more.Instead of talking about their looks, focus on their intelligence or personality.You can say, "You've always been such a caring mom" or "I'm glad to have a Dad who's so creative."
Step 18: Ask your parent to go to the doctor.
It can be hard to get your parent into treatment.It is not possible for you to make your parent do something they don't want to do.Encourage them to see their primary care doctor.They can take the first step toward treatment with this.They can get help from their doctor about their physical needs.