There are those of us who don't like the idea of working on Saturdays and Sundays.The dating can be difficult when the two worlds collide.If you are willing to talk through the issues, develop ground rules, and find compromises that both of you can live with, it is possible to date a workaholic.If you believe it is worth trying to find a way through your date's workaholism, the following steps will give you an idea of how to approach the challenge, even if it does mean you discover that this date is just not the one for you.
Step 1: Do you know if your date is a workaholic?
You're the only person who isn't part of the family who is intimate.Unless they're at the same workplace, he or she has no other friends.Everything is put aside for work, including you.When you contact your date, he or she is still working, no matter what time of day it is.Your date doesn't seem to have a good sense of time.A family birthday is not enough to convince your date to stop working.Your date answers the phone, checks and emails, or makes orders for new supplies all the way through a date.
Step 2: Don't jump to bad conclusions.
When your date is not available to attend the same functions and activities as you, it's important to understand the drive, passion, and importance of work for you.It is possible to increase your understanding of the needs behind working so hard by learning why work is so important to you.The job matters a lot to your date, so consider the possible reasons behind workaholism.It is a passion if it is your date's own business or something that he or she wanted to do all of his or her life.There is a heavy workload and your date is willing to do his or her part to meet it.There are long hours, including nights and weekends.It's important for you to learn to accept it if your date accepts it.It's difficult to break a habit that has become ingrained.
Step 3: Discuss your date's work life with him or her.
You can find out what motivates you at work.You might be able to cut them some slack by understanding this better.These are indicators that your date may be busy, but they can arouse some sympathy in you.It's a very hard time to start a business.The only way to be considered for a promotion is if you are seen working hard all the time.Your date comes from a family of hard-workers who were raised to see excessive working hours as the norm.Is perfectly happy with it!
Step 4: You should look at your own beliefs about working.
If you want to see if you're making more of the matter than it deserves, ask yourself what your own attitude is to work.If you don't think it's a good idea to do more than the bare minimum at work, or you're someone who has a job that does not bleed beyond set hours, you might have a very different mindset from your date.If you're a reformed workaholic or someone who believes in a work-life balance, what you see may be a sign of warning signs for your relationship.You get a lot of time to yourself to pursue your interests without having your date breathing down your neck all the time.Your love life might be better and healthier than you think, according to research done by psychology professor Jonathon Schwartz.You will not feel suffocated by a date who is needy, compliant, or dull.
Step 5: Talk to your date about how they make you feel.
You might be able to reach a compromise at this point.It's great if that is the case.It could be the time when you realize that your date is taking the workaholism too far and won't fit you in.When your date's work has interfered with your dating life, tell them how it feels to play second fiddle to his or her job and give some examples.Explain that you understand his or her passion for the job but want some balance so that the two of you have quality time together.Don't blame.The merry-go-round of never knowing whether or not your date is available is affecting you personally.All the eggs of self-esteem are in the basket of work, so criticism of their work decisions won't endear you to your date.To be realistic, explain how you want things to be.Asking your date to get a new job is not reasonable.
Step 6: Agree on some ground rules.
If you feel that your date has responded well to your talk, suggest that the two of you make some ground rules, or compromises, to ensure the health of your dating life.If you are prepared to make this work, go into this negotiation in good faith, expecting to lower some of your own expectations, even if you don't get the amount of agreement you're looking for.If it is an emergency, ask your date to turn off his or her phone.Don't text or email during the date.It would be great to have certain nights set aside for the two of you.It's a good idea to eat together and watch a movie on Saturday or Sunday.Make this a regular date night.It is a good idea to meet up for lunch once a week.If you're willing to compromise, make the lunch date near your date's place of work to encourage him or her to see this as an easy thing to do.If your date accepts that there is probably an over-reliance of spending more time at work than putting into place more effective work practices and is willing to look at the possibilities, consider if you can help with any suggestions for improving work/life balance.Don't ask, plead, or whine at this point.It won't make a difference, but it will make you look clingy.Start thinking seriously about where this relationship is headed if your date is unwilling to discuss the issues.
Step 7: You should cut your losses now if you feel that continuing to date is not going to work out.
It's probable that your dating relationship is doomed because you haven't got it within you to keep being patient with the work excuses.Your date does not want to compromise under the previous step.You feel like your date doesn't pay enough attention to you when you are together because he or she has one ear to the phone and the other to his or her head.You feel that the time work takes up is more important than your relationship, and that you are jealous of the workplace as being the other interest.If he or she is breaking one or more of the ground rules you agreed to with him or her, you feel like you are being neglected.Nothing changes.No matter what, your date will never get off it, because it feels like a treadmill that goes around and around.Your date's business is still "starting up" years after it began!You can't help but feel that your date has a poor sense of prioritization, lacks the ability to plan properly, or is throwing hours at work problems instead of finding creative and sustainable solutions.
Step 8: When dating again, look for warning signs.
If you get out of a relationship with a workaholic, make sure to keep the signs in mind for future dates.It's a good idea not to get into a new relationship with someone who keeps canceling dates at the last minute.He or she will make time for you, but never do so.Talking about work non-stop will include telling you that the business is going through rough times, or has a lot of work to get through.Behaves as if he or she is indispensable.You are left waiting for an arranged date more than once.