It's difficult to care for someone with dementia.If you are unsure about how to deal with dementia, don't worry, it is normal to have moments where you do not know what to do.Practice is needed to learn how to best talk to someone with dementia, calm their aggressive behaviors or help them with daily tasks.Things can get better.
Step 1: Speak in a calm tone.
It can be difficult to stay calm when you are stressed or upset.The person may view you as a threat because they don't remember who you are.Stand or sit at eye level, instead of looking down at them.Use a reassuring tone to help them understand that you care for them.They may feel like you are trying to boss them around if you speak to them.This may upset them.
Step 2: The person is talking to you.
Eye contact is a sign that you are listening to them.They see that you care about what they say and respect them.Look at them in the eye when you ask a question or hear them speak.While listening, keep your face neutral or friendly.You could give them a soft smile.It is helpful to nod along with what they are saying.
Step 3: Short sentences make them more likely to understand.
Being patient with them can be difficult because of your busy schedule.It is hard for them to follow what you are saying.Keep your questions and instructions short and to the point.Try to stick to a small vocabulary and use familiar words.Ask, "Are you cold?" instead of "Do you need another blanket to help you stay warm?"
Step 4: They should be given as much time as they need to answer your questions.
It can be hard to wait for them to respond, but it will help keep the situation calm.They will probably need some time to think.They might be upset or frustrated if they feel rushed.As they try to find the answers, be patient with them.Think about it as long as you need to.
Step 5: Acknowledge what they say.
If you're caring for a relative, this can be difficult.Sometimes the person will say the wrong thing because they are confused and have trouble remembering.Since what they're saying feels real to them, it's very difficult to tell them they are wrong.Let them know that you heard what they said by repeating it back to them.I am aware that you were served the wrong lunch today.We will try to do better tomorrow.
Step 6: They should be given a chance to speak for themselves.
You may be tempted to answer questions for them because they have a hard time responding.This can make the person feel ignored or disrespected, which can cause them to be upset.Before jumping in, encourage the person to speak.Help fill in the gaps when necessary.You could say, "tell them how sore you are, Grandma."
Step 7: They should be included in conversations that are happening around them.
The person will get confused and may not know what to say, but don't act like they're not there.You should encourage them to talk when they have something to say.It helps them feel respected and acknowledged.Say you are talking to a family member who is coming to visit.When they arrive, ask the person with dementia, "Do you remember Kate?" Later in the conversation, you might say "Isn't that funny?" or "What do you think, Grandma?"They feel included if they go along with it.
Step 8: The person is likely to be afraid or stressed.
If it's from a family member, dealing with aggression can be difficult.It is normal for someone to be aggressive towards you.You should remind yourself that they are the same way.The person's behavior will have nothing to do with you.You can help them calm down by resolving the reason why they are afraid or stressed.Shouting, name calling, pushing, and hitting are aggressive behaviors to watch out for.They can also throw objects.It is a good idea to take a break when the person is aggressive.This will let you relax and calm down.
Step 9: Tell the person that you respect their feelings.
Dementia makes it hard for the person to express themselves, so they may be aggressive.You can help them calm down by letting them know that you hear them.Tell them you understand how they feel.You could say, "I can see that you are very upset about this."I know how you feel, and I want to help.
Step 10: Make sure the basic needs of the person are being met.
They should have eaten, used the restroom, and had plenty of fluids.Address the needs if they haven't been met.This could help calm them down.If you follow a routine, you know that they are getting their needs met.When they take their medication, schedule their meals and bathroom breaks.
Step 11: If it doesn't hurt them, allow the person to do what they want.
It is okay to let the person do odd things if they are not hurting anyone.When you try to stop them from doing something, ask yourself if the behavior is really a problem.Monitor them to make sure they stay safe if it is not.The person wants to wear 2 shirts at the same time.This will not hurt them, so just let them do it.If the person wants to flip TV channels continuously, just let them do it.If you notice that the TV is bothering you, look away from it.They will get tired of doing this on their own eventually.
Step 12: When you can, remove the triggers that might be upsetting the person.
Loud noises, bright lights, and unfamiliar smells can upset a person with dementia.If you notice that they get upset when something happens, try to avoid that in the future.This could help reduce their aggressiveness.The person might be upset when you play loud music in another room.You may be able to calm them down by turning the volume down.When they see their reflection, they may get upset because they don't recognize themselves.You could cover the bathroom, bedroom, and hallway mirrors.
Step 13: To soothe them, surround them with their favorite colors, scents, and souvenirs.
It makes the person more comfortable if they use familiar items.It is possible that it will help them remember things.To find out what they used to enjoy, talk to the person and their family members.Do your best to incorporate those things into their daily life.They can spray their perfume, serve their favorite meals, and put out photos of people they love.Turn on their favorite shows when they play their favorites.This will calm their mood and give them a sense of security.
Step 14: Allow the person to help with daily tasks when they are able to do so.
It is understandable that you would want to do things for the person.Including them in the process helps them maintain their independence and life skills.This will benefit both of you.Do your best to let them help when they can.The severity of their condition will affect how you include them.Someone in the early stages of dementia may be able to do most things on their own.If the person is moderately affected, they may be able to try some things, but need a lot of help.If the person has severe dementia, you might do most of the work for them.
Step 15: To help them remember, place reminders around the home.
They can label the kitchen cabinets and drawers if they put labels on the doors.Put a list of the household routine on the refrigerator or wherever the person will see it best, and remind them to take their medication.Reminders that are specific to the person will be posted.If the person doesn't know which bedroom is theirs, put a label on it.If they get confused about which medication to take, put them in containers labeled "morning" and "night."
Step 16: If they aren't eating enough, give them small portions of their favorite foods.
People with dementia are more likely to resist meals if they don't realize they're hungry.They need to eat.You can help by giving them smaller portions of the foods they like.Both soup and mashed potatoes are easy to eat.Meal times should be scheduled so that they become a regular occurrence.Try a food that is different from the one the person is used to.It is possible that the person dislikes a certain flavor.
Step 17: All walkways should be free of trip hazard.
Keeping the floor and walkways clear can help prevent someone from getting hurt.To make sure all pathways are clear, do daily sweeps.They will be able to move around their home safely.If the person has trouble with coordination, make sure their cane or walker is nearby at all times.You might want to make sure that they have sturdy furniture to hold onto.Look at the rugs and carpets against the floor.If the rug gets bent or flipped up, it can become a trip hazard.
Step 18: Let them help if they can.
The person needs to care for their hair, teeth, and skin.They should do these tasks on their own whenever possible.They may need help from you.When helping with hygiene tasks, be discreet.You can help the person get into the shower and sit in their shower seat, but you can also let them wipe themselves with the washcloth.
Step 19: They need to lay out clothes in order to get dressed.
You could put their clothes on the drawer.They should put their underwear first, followed by their pants and shirt.If they are wearing any shoes, they will come last.They don't have to remember the process for getting dressed.Help them if they struggle to put on the pieces.