How To Support a friend after surgery.

It can be traumatic to have surgery.If you have a friend who just underwent a procedure, you may be worried about what to say.You can be a great asset to a recovering friend if you stay patient and supportive after a surgery.

Step 1: Go ahead and plan your visit.

Recovering from surgery is not the same as a spur of the moment visit.Hospitals often have specific visiting hours, so your friend might need to prepare physically and emotionally for visitors.Hospitals visit hours and policies.There are different protocols for visiting a friend in the hospital.If your friend is still in the recovery room, only one visitor at a time is permitted, with the nurse's permission and supervision, and there are stricter rules for personal hygiene.Call the hospital ahead of time to inquire about visiting hours.Try to get in touch with a family member or spouse to find out when is a good time to visit.You will have a better idea of how your friend is feeling, what tests have been run, and whether they're up for visitors.You should plan your visit after you know.Call or text to make sure you're still welcome.You should stay about 20 or 30 minutes.You should leave your friend sooner if he is tired or disengaged.If they are excited to talk to you and seem happy to see you, then you can stay longer.

Step 2: Know what to do after surgery.

A lot of things can be hard on patients just out of surgery, so make sure you don't do anything that will make them uncomfortable.People are often sensitive to smells when they're sick or recovering from surgery, so don't wear strong smelling products.Many healthcare facilities are now odor-free.When you leave a friend's room, wash your hands with soap, water, alcohol rubs, or hand sanitizer.You could be required to wear a gown, gloves, and/or a mask if you check with the nurses' station.People are more likely to get sick after an operation.Ask the hospital staff if it's safe for you to visit your friend if you have a cold or flu, as it usually isn't.If you are a smoker, you should only smoke in designated areas and not near your friend.If you bring a non service dog into the hospital, you could be banned because of the risk of spreading germs.If you swear, you can be thrown out and banned from the hospital.The patient's bed can spread germs.Don't put your feet on the bed.Don't touch the patient's wounds or medical equipment.You can be removed from the hospital if you use the patient's bathroom or toilet and spread germs.Do not share any property with a patient.

Step 3: Bring a gift.

If they're not feeling well, people love to receive gifts.It's not about money, but knowing that a person cares.Bring a small gift to your friend for them to enjoy.Many people think that flowers are good for a hospital stay.shelf-space in a hospital room is limited because they take up a lot of room.They are hard to transport and decay quickly.Consider an interactive gift for a hospital patient.You can try novels, magazines, crossword puzzle, or a journal.If your friend has an iPad or other electronic device, you can give them a gift certificate to purchase their own entertainment.The patient should bring their favorite snack if food is allowed.Even if you mean well, they might not want to eat, as surgery and medications can affect their appetite.Many patients are placed on special diet after surgery, and some may not be allowed to eat until their normal bowel function returns.

Step 4: The hospital should feel like home.

A hospital can be impersonal.If you can create a homey environment for your friend in the hospital room, they will feel less alien.The room should be decorated.beige or white hospital rooms can become depressing with time.Posters, hanging blankets, and throw pillows are welcome.Check with the hospital staff to make sure you don't violate any policies.Bring them something familiar.During a surgery, familiarity can be a comfort.A small photo album of friends, family members, beloved pets, and other loved ones.Use your friend's iPod to create a custom soundtrack or burn them a mix CD.Many hospital rooms have a television set that patients can use, so buy DVD's of your favorite movies and TV shows.When visiting, act natural.Sharing news of mutual friends and discussing what's been happening in the news or on TV will help your friend get back to a sense of normal.Even if your friend is in a hospital room, let them know that they are part of the world.

Step 5: Group visits should be organized.

If you can, get a group of friends together to visit your friend after you make sure he is up to it.Group visits feel like a more natural way to hang out than one-on-one communication.Your friend will be happy to see how many people care for each other.Make sure the hospital policy doesn't limit the number of people allowed in a room at a time.

Step 6: It's important to plan for the future.

Future plans and promises can give your friend something to look forward to after their hospital stay, and reassurance that their needs won't be forgotten once they're released.Sometime after they are released from the hospital, set a date to go see a movie, eat out, or shop.After their stay is over, your friend will appreciate having something small to look forward to.Provide any assistance in the transition back home, such as driving your friend back from the hospital and running an errand for them.

Step 7: Help out with food.

Food is one of the biggest issues after surgery as we all need to eat, and sometimes cooking and shopping are difficult in the wake of an operation.You should be prepared to provide meals for your friend during their recovery.Offer to buy groceries.If you can, go grocery shopping for your friend.If you're planning a shopping trip of your own, make sure to check in with them to see if there's anything they need.Bring the dishes with you.If your friend is not comfortable shopping with someone else, cook for them.There are dishes that can be re-heated and kept for a long time.Aim for casseroles, soups, and salads.You should be aware of any diet restrictions your friend might have.Certain foods are not allowed after an operation.Before you cook a dish, ask your friend about the kinds of food the doctor has advised against.Make sure you know if your friend had any restrictions on their diet before the surgery.

Step 8: Help with chores.

Don't tell them to call you.They won't want to bother you.Give specific help, like, "I have some free time this afternoon, do you need help with anything?"Your friend will appreciate a helping hand after surgery, as household chores are a burden.Laundry, dishes, dusting, and any other cleaning can be done.Don't let your friend fall behind you.Donate the extra hour to a friend in need.Help if they have pets.Make sure the animals have food or water by cleaning the litter box.All of this will be appreciated.If necessary, provide free babysitting.Whether your friend is a single parent or has a spouse who is busy with work, chances are they will need help with the kids after surgery.It is appreciated.

Step 9: Provide something to amuse you.

Sometimes recovery gets boring, and all a person wants is good conversation and a little entertainment, because cooking and cleaning are tangible means to help a friend in need.It's a good idea to spend a weekend night with a friend.Share what's happening in your life, but keep it positive.You don't need to mention that you were laid off or had a fight with your spouse.You can be a source of positive energy.You can watch a movie with your friend.Pick up a DVD on the way over or rent from an online outlet if there's anything they've been itching to watch.The monotony can be broken by playing board games and cards.If you can get a group of people together, stop by your friends house for a round of poker or a game of Clue.It's not likely that your friend can drink with their post- surgery medication.Be nice.Don't drink when your friend cannot.

Step 10: Offer to go to the exams with a friend.

There will be a number of doctor's appointments after a surgery.Having a support system for someone recovering from surgery is a great benefit.Let your friend know that you can take them to the doctor.Public transportation can be difficult following surgery because of medication interfering with the ability to drive.It's important to offer a mode of transportation.The waiting room is a good place to entertain a friend.Playing cards, books of crossword puzzles, magazines, and books can be brought while waiting for the doctor.It's a good idea to stop for a drink or have lunch after the visit.Trips to the doctor can be more enjoyable if you have something to look forward to.

Step 11: Consider how close you are to this friend.

When it comes to what you should and shouldn't say to someone after surgery, the level of emotional intimacy makes a huge difference.It's easier to ask questions if you're close.If it's a more formal friendship, or just a new one, don't let the seriousness of a surgery make you say something you're not comfortable with."How are you feeling?" is a good question to ask.Do you need any help today?

Step 12: Allow your friend to feel something.

It's possible that your friend isn't feeling their best after an operation.People need a pep talk or reassurance.It can be frustrating for a friend who just wants to express their thoughts.Allow your friend to talk and accept their feelings.Phrases like "I know how you feel" should not be used.It's difficult to understand a situation you're not used to.Say something like "I can understand how you would feel that way."Tell me more."You shouldn't feel that way" or "Cheer up" are things that should not be said.It comes off as judgmental if someone is discouraged.Can you tell me why you feel that way?Words that let your friend know you're listening.

Step 13: Try to listen.

Active listening is when you listen to what another person is saying and understand what they're saying.They are the priority if you are helping a friend after surgery.If your friend needs to vent, try to be a patient and active listener.Pay attention.Give your friend your full attention by looking at them directly, engaging with their body language, and avoiding being distracted by the environment.Show that you're listening.Nod occasionally, smile and use other facial expressions, make sure your posture is open and inviting, and encourage the speaker to continue with verbal comments like "yes" and "I see."Provide feedback.Your role is to understand what is being said, so you may need to ask questions and reflect on what your friend is saying.Try to remember, "So, what you're saying is..." and "What I'm hearing..."Better judgement.Don't interrupt your friend.Wait until he or she is done talking before asking a question.Appropriately respond.Without dismissing your friends concerns or issues, be candid, open, and honest about your responses.

Step 14: Ask the right questions.

When your friend is interested in hearing about you and your life, only talk about yourself.Talking to a friend after surgery is important, so make sure you ask the right questions.Unless they bring it up, don't ask about their health or test results.People recovering from surgery might not want to go into details about their doctor visits.Ask how they're feeling.It's appropriate to ask a more vague question.Your friend has control.He or she can either keep things light or open up about their medical issues.Ask if they need something.Your friend might need assistance with day-to-day chores, so make sure to offer as people are often wary of asking for favors.Ask about family members and loved ones.Show your friend that you care by investing in the things they care about.

Step 15: Understand the nature of surgery anxiety.

Empathetic is the key to being a supportive, loving friend.Seeking to understand any fears associated with surgery can help you empathise.Loss of control is one of the biggest fears when it comes to surgery.The loss of control over one's body and movements after surgery is frustrating, as people fear handing their well-being over to someone else.It is normal for a friend to feel a lack of control.A better life is at stake when it comes to surgery.If improvement is gradual or if the recovery period is long, disappointment can set in fast.When dealing with a friend, remind them that progress takes time.Fear of mortality comes from going to hospitals and undergoing anesthesia.This is the biggest fear associated with surgery, so be aware that your friend might want to discuss dark subjects when you visit them.Be prepared for this.

Step 16: Know how to deal with anxiety and surgery.

When in a hospital setting, most people experience some kind of fear and anxiety.You can share ways to cope with anxiety with your friend.It is important to have self-trust.THe root of anxiety is distrust.This distrust is often projected onto others, but is also a reflection of distrust for oneself.Make your friend aware that they are capable of doing whatever is necessary for recovery.Taking action can help.Encourage your friend to engage in activities that help with anxiety and promote good physical well-being.Eat right, exercise, meditate, spend time outside, and engage in hobbies.Staying calm is dependent on planning.Tell your friend to focus on healing and not worry.Help them make a plan for when they'll be laid up.List all the materials needed, such as groceries and reading materials.Help your friend figure out what they can do after surgery and make a plan to do it.

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