Your sexual orientation is part of who you are.It's great if you're ready to share it with others.It's normal to feel scared and emotional when coming out.It can help strengthen your relationships.It's a good idea to think about why you want to come out.Write down what you want to say so that you can have a constructive conversation.Before you go to school, it is a good idea to find a support system.
Step 1: You should get comfortable with your sexual orientation.
It is possible that you have identified as LGBTQ for a while.If you're having trouble acknowledging that to yourself, you might not be ready to share that with other people.You're too young to know which sex or gender you want to be with, so don't worry.You can know how you feel.
Step 2: There are stories about other people's experiences.
It can be helpful to learn how other people dealt with coming out.It's a good idea to read about the experiences of other LGBTQ people.There are a lot of great resources to look at.If you have any friends or family members who identify as LGBTQ, you could ask them what it was like to come out.
Step 3: You can make a list of reasons to come out.
It's a really personal decision if you want to come out.It's important that you're doing it because you want to, not because of pressure from someone else.Maybe you want to start dating or maybe you're ready to be more open in your relationships.Those are great reasons to come out.People might make assumptions about your sexual orientation.You don't have to come out to confirm or correct their assumptions.If you want to do it, come out.
Step 4: Pick one to tell first, the supportive people in your life.
Before coming out to the world, it's a good idea to choose a trusted advisor.Remember, your identity is your business and you don't have to share it with anyone that you do not want to.You can count on some people.A good person to start with is on that list.Your parents, siblings, a friend, or another family member could be on your list.One on one conversations are less intimidating than talking to multiple people so it's a good idea to start with one person.It's okay to tell both of your parents at the same time.
Step 5: Expect a wide range of possible reactions.
If you tell anyone, they will be supportive and kind.It's not always the case.It's okay to take a time out if you encounter any of the other possible reactions.You can tell me that you're upset.You might be able to reach out to me when you're calmer.
Step 6: If you get a negative reaction, plan what to do.
When you're young, you most likely rely on your parents for food, clothing, and shelter.Wait to come out if you think your parents won't support you.You shouldn't be ashamed of waiting until you live on your own to tell your parents.You can reach out to a more supportive relative in the meantime.They might be able to help you navigate this difficult situation.You should have a back-up plan if you are worried about their reaction.If your parents kick you out, ask a friend or family member if you can stay with them.It's always best to be prepared, but hopefully that won't happen.
Step 7: If you want to be free from distraction, choose a time and place.
You should be able to talk privately and without interruption.Do you have time to talk after dinner?Ask them to sit in your living room or bedroom because I have something important to tell you.Try not to start the conversation when they are busy.Do you want to come over after soccer practice?If you're worried that the other person will get angry, you can have the conversation at a nearby coffee shop.
Step 8: The focus needs to be on the positives.
You don't want to sound like you're sharing bad news.You can be proud of who you are.Make eye contact and use a positive tone of voice.I wanted to let you know that I'm gay.You could also say that you are a lesbian and are ready to start dating girls.Hopefully, the other person will take a cue from your positive attitude and react in the same way.
Step 9: You should be honest about your feelings.
Sharing any other feelings that you might have is okay.Maybe you're afraid.You can ask for support if you share that part of yourself.Say, "I'm excited to tell you, but I am nervous about how others will react."You could say, "I'm glad I told you, but this has been a really emotional process for me."I could use more.
Step 10: Help them understand by providing educational resources.
Your parents might not know what it means to identify as LGBTQ.They might need to know how to support you.You can give them a lot of information.Check out the websites of groups like PFLAG.You can either tell them about the site or print it off.You can get helpful pamphlets at the community center if it is in your town or school.You could say, "I know you might not understand."Here's some information that might help.
Step 11: Expect to be asked personal questions.
There are a lot of things your parents or friends want to know.They might be coming from a place of wanting to understand you if they start asking a lot of questions.If you want to answer the questions, it's fine to say, "I really don't feel comfortable talking about that."They might ask, "Are you ready for your life to change?", as well as "I'm a little nervous, actually."I'm hoping you will support me.
Step 12: Let them know who they can tell.
This is your personal information.It is normal for other people to want to discuss big news with someone else.Let them know if this is okay.If you don't tell any other family members, I'd really appreciate it.I will let you know when I'm ready to do that.If I say it is okay, please don't share it with our other friends.
Step 13: Before you come out, you should research anti-bully rules.
There are strict rules about how students treat each other in many schools.Some people might not be accepting of you if you come out at a supportive school.The school website has information about protections against harassment.You might not want to go to school if there aren't any.You can ask your parents to look into it.You could say, "I just want to make sure there's a no tolerance policy for harassment at my school."Can you look into that for me?
Step 14: First, choose a trusted teacher or coach.
If you're going to be out at school, an adult might be able to help.They can help you deal with any issues that come up.You should come out to your teacher or coach if you have a good relationship.A guidance counselor is a great choice.You can schedule an appointment.I wanted to let you know that I am gay.Does the school offer any support services?
Step 15: When you are ready, look for student-led support clubs.
There are student activities at your school.You could join a Gay-Straight Alliance.It's a good bet that those people would be supportive of you.Just come out to a small group of people.You don't need to be out to everyone.
Step 16: If you want to come out, use social media or word of mouth.
It is possible that you are excited to live openly at school.You can make changes to your social media if you want to let the whole school know.Facebook allows you to express your identity in your profile.You can post a supportive image on your IG and write a caption like "I'm coming out!"Your friends can help you spread the word.Feel free to tell people my news.I'm looking forward to living more openly.
Step 17: There are steps you can take to protect yourself.
You should also come out to an adult if you do that to other students.Someone will understand your situation if there is any bully.Hopefully, everyone respects you.If students are threatening, take precautions.You can walk to class with a friend.There's strength in numbers.You should report any incidents to your parents.No one has the right to make you feel uncomfortable.