It can be hard to see a loved one deal with depression.It can be hard to understand what they are going through.If you live with someone with depression, remind yourself that they are not thin-skinned or choosing to be sad.Encourage them to seek treatment if they haven't already done so.Be sure to maintain your mental and physical health, and remember that your needs are important.
Step 1: How can you help your loved one feel better?
Let them know that they can be honest without fear of judgement.They may not want to talk or ask for anything, but you can still offer comfort.Say, "You are so important to me" if you notice they seem sad or can't get out of bed.Is there anything I can do to help?If they don't say anything, sitting next to them or holding their hand is an important gesture.It is important to ask them how they are doing from time to time, but resist the urge to check in all the time.It's counter-productive to remind your loved one of their depression.
Step 2: They are experiencing real pain.
They shouldn't try to give them tough love or minimize their struggle.Depression is not related to being thin-skinned or being bothered by little things.It is a medical condition, so let them know that their pain is real, instead of telling them to snap out of it.No one should be shamed for seeking treatment for a physical or mental condition.Mental health conditions are the same as diseases such as diabetes or pneumonia.You wouldn't tell someone with a more visible illness to get over it.
Step 3: They should be encouraged to use person-first language.
A person with depression may feel like they are in control of their life.When describing depression or other mental health conditions, using language that puts the person first takes the emphasis off the condition and puts it on them.They can feel more confident if they know they are separate from their depression.Encourage them to say something like "I have depression" or " I'm dealing with depression."
Step 4: They should not focus on their depression.
If your loved one continues to participate in normal routines and activities, it can help them deal with the symptoms of depression.If you can act like your loved one is not depressed, you will be more likely to invite them to participate in activities you both enjoy.They may be able to get into a less depressed mindset.Depression does not define who your loved one is.Point out your loved one's strengths and good qualities whenever you can.
Step 5: Ask them to do activities with you.
Encourage them to get out of the house with you.Try to get them to go for a walk or bike ride.If you can convince them to get active, think of their hobbies, activities, and games.Ask, "How about we get some fresh air?"You could say, "You've always loved gardening, will you go for a walk with me?"I can take you to the garden center, and we can plant some flowers together.If you can't get your loved one to leave their bed or room, try opening the blinds or curtains.You could play cards or a board game with them.
Step 6: Encourage them to take responsibility and care for them.
Depression, personal hygiene, cooking, and household chores can seem overwhelming.If you can, help your loved one do as many tasks on their own as possible.Accomplishing things can help boost your loved one's self-confidence.Instead of cooking all of their meals, say, "Come help me cook dinner."I would like to show you a great recipe.It will be fun!
Step 7: Don't take threats of self-injury or suicide lightly.
If your loved one has a doctor or therapist, you should immediately report any threats of suicide.If you can, tell your loved one that you love them, and assure them that they don't have to struggle with this on their own.If you believe your loved one is in danger of harming themselves or others, you can call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.You can find a list of international lifelines at http://ibpfinternational.org.If you need immediate help, call emergency services and ask the operator to send first responders who have been trained to deal with mental health crises.
Step 8: You can model healthy behaviors by caring for yourself.
While living with a loved one who has depression, make sure to maintain your boundaries and self-care routines.Try not to let your loved one's moods affect your positive outlook.You can model healthy behaviors and attitudes for your loved one by caring for yourself and being yourself as much as possible.They act and feel influenced by your behavior and mood.
Step 9: Let your concerns be known gently and objectively.
Don't come off as panicked or blaming them for anything.Tell your loved one you care about them and that you have noticed some troubling signs.Don't make it seem like you're listing everything that's wrong with them if you mention specific examples to back your statements with facts.I care about you and you are very important to me.You seem sad and angry a lot lately, and you haven't been interested in doing the things you used to enjoy.You can deal with this on your own.It is a good idea to talk to them about your concerns while they are feeling well.A person in the midst of a depression may have a hard time talking about their feelings.
Step 10: Ask other family members to share their concerns.
Your loved one may deny that they need help.Ask your friends or relatives to lend you support if you are worried.Hearing the same idea from multiple sources might help your loved one come to terms with the idea of seeing a medical professional.Only involve people who your loved one trusts.Tell anyone you involve that they should be gentle, express how much they care, and avoid ganging up on your loved one.Have patience.It might take a while for your loved one to seek help.Unless they are a minor or are at risk of hurting themselves or others, offering encouragement might be your only option.
Step 11: The focus should be on how their behaviors affect them.
Talking to your loved one in a concrete way is a good way to broach your concerns.Think of specific things that they do while struggling with depression that impact them or their relationships in a negative way.You could say, "When you're really down, I notice that you tend to call in sick to work a lot."If you keep doing that, you might lose your job.I feel hurt and frustrated when you lash out at me when I am depressed.I think therapy can help you deal with angry feelings in a healthier way.
Step 12: Discuss what they are feeling and how you can help.
Ask them if they would like to discuss their experience with depression.Each person experiences depression in their own way, so they may have different struggles or find things helpful.If your loved one has a hard time getting up in the morning when they are depressed, ask them if there is a way you can help them get up on time.They need solutions that work for them.
Step 13: They shouldn't be ashamed about seeking treatment.
Let them know that taking care of their mental and physical well-being is the same thing.They shouldn't worry about being judged for seeking treatment for a health issue.Sometimes a person catches a cold and it goes away on its own.Sometimes a person needs to see a doctor.Sometimes the symptoms of sadness or loss of interest go away on their own.If they are hesitant to see a mental health professional, make an appointment with their primary doctor.They might prefer to see their regular doctor first.If you want to offer moral support or share your observations with the doctor, you should go with your loved one.It can be difficult to admit to feeling depressed or discuss it with your doctor, and having an advocate along for support can help.
Step 14: Give your loved one rides to support groups.
You should assure them that you are willing to provide practical support.Tell them you will help them find medical professionals, bring them to appointments, attend sessions with them, fill their prescriptions, and look for local support groups for people living with depression.I will be with you every step of the way.It is fine if you want to handle it in a more private way.If you need me to go to the doctor's with you, give you rides, or help you in any way, you can count on me.
Step 15: They need help keeping track of their medication and appointments.
Help them remember when to see their doctor, take their medicine, and refill their prescriptions with their permission.If they are not a minor, you should be aware of how involved you are with their treatment.Taking responsibility for their own treatment can help empower them.They might want to maintain their privacy.If that is the case, you should lend your support and keep an eye on their progress.Encourage them to take their medication.It might take 2 or 3 months for them to find the right medicine.Try not to worry or be frustrated.It might take a while, but things will get better.
Step 16: Don't blame yourself, be patient.
It can be difficult to live with someone with a mental illness.It might be difficult for you to see your loved one struggle.Don't take anything they say personally, and remind yourself that depression is a disease.Don't take on more than you can handle.You can only offer love, support, and encouragement if you are a medical professional.You can't fix your loved one's mental illness on your own.
Step 17: Take care of your physical and mental health.
Stay active, eat well, and get enough rest.You will not be able to help others if you don't meet your own needs.A good diet includes fruits, vegetables, lean meats, and low-fat dairy products.Don't skip meals and try not to eat junk food.It's best to get 7 to 9 hours of sleep each night.Try to exercise for at least 30 minutes a day.You could join a gym or go for a walk.
Step 18: It is a good idea to set aside time to do things you enjoy.
Stay in touch with your friends, keep up with social engagements, and pursue hobbies as best you can.Take some time to have fun.Take a hot bubble bath, go to a concert, read a good book, or play a sport.It is possible to care for a loved one with depression.You might spend a lot of time with them when they have bad days.Ask a trusted friend or relative to take over for a few hours if you need a break.
Step 19: You can join a local family support group.
Check with local hospitals and community mental health agencies to find a group.You can get in touch with people in similar circumstances if you join a support group for those helping loved ones cope with mental illness.If you start to feel overwhelmed, talk to a counselor on your own.