Whether we consciously or not, every decision we make is the result of a decision.There is no easy formula for making the right decision for every choice.You can approach it from many different perspectives and then choose a course of action that seems reasonable and balanced at that time.It can be hard to make a big decision.You can make it less intimidating by following your gut instincts, making a spreadsheet, and identifying the worst case scenario.You can learn more about how to make decisions.
Step 1: Write about your fears.
Journaling about your fears can help you understand them and make a better decision.Write about the decision you need to make.Is there anything you are worried about regarding this decision?Don't judge yourself for having these fears.You can start your journal by asking yourself, "What is the decision that I need to make and what am I afraid might happen if I make the wrong choice?"
Step 2: Pick the worst case scenario.
You should take it a step further if you have written about the decision you need to make and why you are afraid of it.Pick out the worst case scenario for each and every choice.The process may be less frightening if you push your decision to the limit.If you need to decide between staying full time at your job or taking a part time job in order to spend more time with your kids, think about what the worst case scenario would be.If you decide to keep the full time job, the worst case scenario is that your children will resent you when they are older because you missed out on important moments in their development.You might not be able to pay the bills if you keep the part time job.Decide if the worst-case scenario is likely to happen.It is easy for us to spin things out to be the worst possible thing that can happen.Think about what would have to happen to get you there in the worst scenario you have proposed.Is this possible?
Step 3: Should you make the decision permanent?
Think about whether the decision is irreversible after you think about everything that could go wrong.You can take comfort in knowing that if you dislike your decision, you can always change it.If you decide to take a part-time job, you will be spending more time with your kids.If you end up having trouble paying your bills, you can look for a full time job.
Step 4: You can talk to a friend or family member.
Don't feel like you have to make a decision on your own.It's a good idea to have a trusted friend or family member listen to your concerns.Share your fears about what could go wrong as well as the details of the decision.It may make you feel better to just vocalize your fears and your friend or family member may have some reassuring words for you.A person who is removed from the situation will have a neutral opinion.A therapist can be a good source for this perspective.It is possible to search online for other people who have experienced the same situation.You could post your problem on a parenting forum if you were trying to decide between full-time work and part time work.Some people will tell you what they would do in your situation, as well as people who have had to make similar decisions.
Step 5: Stay calm.
The ability to make a rational decision can be impacted by riding high on emotions.The first thing to do when you have a decision to make is to be as calm as possible.Make the decision if you can't stay calm.Take a few deep breaths to calm yourself down.If you have more time, you can do 10 minutes of deep breathing exercises in a quiet room.If you want to perform deep breathing exercises, place your hand on your belly and chest.You should feel your chest and abdomen expand when you exhale.Slowly exhale through your nose.To get a 4-count, aim to inhale.As your lungs expand, focus on the feeling of the breath.The breath should be held for 1-2 seconds.Take the breath out through your nose or mouth.For a 4-count, aim to exhale.For 10 minutes, repeat this process 10 times per minute.
Step 6: Get as much information as you can.
It is better to have enough information to make an informed decision.Logic should be used when making decisions about important topics.It's a good idea to research as much as you can about your decision.If you were to switch jobs to spend more time with your kids, you would need to know how much money would be lost each month.You would have to consider how much time you would get with your kids.As well as any other relevant information that might help you make your decision, record this information.You would need to gather information about other options as well.You can ask your employer if it is possible for you to telecommute at least a few days a week.
Step 7: The five whys technique can be used to understand the problem.
It is possible to determine if you are making a decision for the right reasons by asking yourself "Why?" five times.If you were trying to decide between keeping your full time job and moving to a part-time job to have more time with your family, your five reasons might look like this:I work late most nights.We have a new account that is taking up a lot of my time.I am trying to do a good job and hopefully get promoted as a result.To provide for my family and earn more money.The five whys show that you might reduce your hours even though you are hoping for a promotion.There is a conflict that needs further investigation in order to make a good decision.The five reasons suggest that the problem may be temporary because you have a new account.Will your hours stay the same once you are more comfortable with your new account?
Step 8: Think about the people who are affected.
You should think about how your decision affects you.How does your decision affect you as a person?What are your goals?You can be unhappy and dissatisfied if you make decisions that don't align with your core beliefs.If you are no longer pursuing your ambition of getting promoted and becoming the top person at your company, moving to part-time could be a sign of a misalignment.It is possible that your core values conflict with one another.You may have family-orientedness and ambition as core values.It's possible that you need to prioritize one over the other to make a decision.Understanding what values will be affected by your decision can help you make the right one.How the decision affects other people should also be considered.Will the outcomes affect people you care about?If you are married or have children, you should take into account others during your decision making process.If you decide to move to part-time, you may have to give up on your ambition for a promotion in order to have more time with your kids.Reducing your income may have a negative effect on your family.
Step 9: List all of your options.
It may seem like there is only one course of action, but that is usually not the case.Try to make a list of alternatives if your situation seems limited.Don't try to evaluate them until you have a full list.Be thorough.If you can't come up with an alternative, talk to your family or friends.This doesn't have to be a physical list.It can be in your head as well.If you have crazy ideas, you can always cross items off the list.It is possible to find another full-time job at a company that does not require overtime.If you hire a person to help you with housework, you can spend more time with your family.Setting up a family work evening where everyone does their work in the same room will help you all feel more connected.Research shows that having too many options can make it hard to make a decision.Eliminate anything that is impractical once you have generated your list.Keep your options to about five.
Step 10: The benefits and losses of your decisions can be weighed on a spreadsheet.
If you feel overwhelmed by the variety of possible outcomes, make a spreadsheet to guide your decision making.Microsoft excel can be used to make a spreadsheet, or you can just use a piece of paper.You can make a spreadsheet by creating a column for each possible choice.To compare the benefits and losses of each outcome, make two sub-columns within each column.The signs indicate which items are positive and which are negative.Each item on your list can have points values assigned to it.You can assign points to an item on the "Switch to Part-time Work" list called " will get to have dinner with my kids every night" or the other way around.You may not be able to make a decision on your own.
Step 11: The space between thoughts should be opened.
Creative people don't know it, but their ideas, decisions and solutions come at times when they are not thinking.Creative and intelligent solutions come from a state of consciousness.People meditate because of this.If you want to come up with a truly creative and intelligent decision, you need to stop thinking or at least slow down.One of the structure-less methods of bringing space between thoughts is breath meditation.It doesn't require you to devote a lot of time because you can become aware of your breath while doing daily tasks.Stay Rooted in Being has more methods and details.The creative intelligence that comes through a musician's knowledge and tools is what drives the tools.Creative intelligence is the essence of a song and knowledge about music instruments, singing etc is not important.
Step 12: There is an impulse and an intelligent decision.
It is usually dissolved after sometime.There is an impulse to eat, shop, travel.An intelligent decision stays in your head for a while.It could be a long time.If you feel the same way about an intelligence decision after a while, be aware.Taking gaps after collecting information helps to make intelligent decisions.After you take a few deep breaths, notice the quality of your actions compared to when they arise out of an impulse.
Step 13: As if you were a friend.
It is possible to take a step back from the decision.Think about what you would say to a friend who was in the same boat.What would you tell them to do?What do you want them to know about that decision?Why would you counsel them this way?Role playing is a good way to use this strategy.Pretend that you are talking to yourself while sitting next to an empty chair.If you don't want to sit and talk to yourself, you can write yourself a letter.In the beginning of your letter, say, "I have considered your situation and I think that the best thing for you to do is to _____." Continue the letter by explaining your point of view from an outsider's perspective.
Step 14: You can play devil's advocate.
Playing devil's advocate can help you decide how you really feel about a decision because you have to argue for it as if you are your own.You will have new information to consider if your argument against something starts to make sense.If you want to make your preferred choice, try to argue against every good reason.You may want to make a different choice if it is easy to do.If you're leaning towards going part-time to spend more time with your kids, make sure to point out that you spend a lot of quality time together on the weekends and during your vacations.You can say that missing out on some family dinners is worth it because they can benefit your children more than an extra couple of hours of your time every night.It is worth considering that they will benefit your own ambition.
Step 15: Do you feel guilty?
Guilt is not a good motivator for healthy decision making.Guilt twists our perception of events and outcomes so that we aren't seeing them clearly.Working women face extra social pressure to balance work and family life, which can lead to guilt.It can lead us to make decisions that aren't in line with our values if we do things because we feel guilty.Looking for "should" or "Must" statements is one way to recognize guilt motivation.You might think that good parents spend all the time with their children and bad parents work long hours.To determine whether your decision is being driven by guilt, try to step back and examine the situation, as well as what your personal values tell you is right.Is it true that your children are suffering because you are working full-time?Do you think that's how you've been told by others?
Step 16: Think of the future.
The best way to make a decision is to think about how you will feel about it in a few years.When you look in the mirror, think about what you think of yourself.How you will explain it to your kids.You may need to rethink your approach if you don't like what the long term repercussions are going to be.Do you think moving to part-time will make you regret it in 10 years?Why do you think so?In 10 years of working full-time, what will you accomplish that you won't do in 10?
Step 17: Trust your instincts.
If all else fails, you should go with your gut.Even if the spreadsheet says otherwise, make your decision based on what feels right.People who make decisions based on how they feel tend to be more satisfied with their decisions than people who don't.Do you want to do something?You should lean towards the decision that will make you feel the most happy.The decision is difficult because of the change and the unknown.Quiet reflection can help you get in touch with your intuition.The more decisions you make, the better.
Step 18: There is a backup plan.
It is possible to feel less bothered by negative outcomes by thinking ahead.If you have a worst case scenario, make a backup plan.Even if you don't need this plan, having a backup plan will make you feel more prepared for the worst case scenario.People in leadership positions are expected to have a backup plan in case something goes wrong.This strategy may be useful for making small decisions.You can respond to unforeseen challenges or setbacks with flexibility if you have a backup plan.Adaptability can affect your ability to succeed with your decisions.
Step 19: Make a choice.
Accept responsibility for every outcome no matter what you decide to do.It's always better to make a conscious decision if things don't work out.You can say that you did the best you could.Be prepared to stand by your decision.