How To Deal with an Obsessed Ex Lover

The relationship may be over, but your ex is not.The best way to deal with an obsessed ex is to make it clear that it's over.If you follow some general guidelines, you can make your ex understand that you have broken up once and for all, and to protect yourself if he starts to pose a real danger.

Step 1: Don't let the break up drag on.

Trying to let your ex go easy can backfire.Don't be tempted to go back to someone if you feel bad for him or her or want to hurt him.If you want to break up with someone, it is best for you to do it and move on.

Step 2: It is clear that the relationship has ended.

It is important to be clear that the relationship is over if you are dealing with an ex that will not leave you alone.Be kind, but firm.The ex might think that the relationship is still ongoing or that you will get back together at some point.We ended our relationship a month ago.I don't have time for a relationship right now, so I need to focus on myself.If you tried to break up with your ex and he or she didn't like it, try again, make sure to be absolutely clear.Try saying something like, "When we talked last time, I wanted it to be clear that we are no longer in a relationship, but I don't think you understood me."We are not in a relationship.Do you understand now?

Step 3: Let people know that the relationship is over.

Tell your family and friends that you and your ex have broken up.The more public the information is, the more realistic it will look to your ex.If you broke up quietly and didn't tell others, your ex might see it as a sign that you are still interested in him.

Step 4: Don't talk to your ex.

An obsessive ex may try to initiate contact with you, such as calling or texting.If you say leave me alone, the ex may see it as a sign that you are still interested.It's best to avoid all contact with an obsessive ex.It's a good idea to leave calls, texts, and emails.It is unanswered.Ignore or remove them.If your ex sends you gifts, don't return them.Throw them out.

Step 5: You can remove the ex from your social media accounts.

Social media can make it hard to deal with an obsessed ex.It is possible for your ex to try to contact you through your social media profiles.If you don't want your ex to be in touch with you, you can remove him from your social media contact lists.

Step 6: Stay away from him.

It is possible to avoid physical contact with an obsessive ex.The obsession will hopefully come to an end if he or she doesn't see you.It's possible that you have to change your behavior.If you think you will run into your ex at a coffee shop you frequent, you may want to visit another one.On the plus side, you get to explore some new places and get a fresh start.

Step 7: When the situation gets worse, recognize it.

If you think your ex is going to become a stalker, the situation might be dangerous.You may need help when this happens.The difference between stalking and obsession is that it involves a long-term pattern of harassment or abuse.Stalking is legal when someone repeatedly comes near you or contacts you when you have asked him/her or made threats that have caused you fear or the worry of harm.Contact the police if you are the victim of stalking.Stalking is against the law in all states.When your ex: Follows you loiters near your home, workplace, or other area that you frequent or threatens to install it, is one of the most common signs of stalking.Vandalizes or destroys your personal property, harms your pet, or sexually assaults someone you know.

Step 8: If you need it, get an order of protection.

A protective order can be issued by a court.If your ex breaks the rules of the protective order, he or she can be arrested and fined or imprisoned.Contact the authorities in your area if your ex poses a danger to you or others.Laws governing these orders vary from location to location, but you can find out more about your options by contacting The police.

Step 9: If there is a sign of a threat, contact the police.

If your ex puts you or someone close to you in danger, contact the police immediately.If the police don't think the situation is a problem, be persistent in letting them know about your ex's stalking behavior.Refer to any past reports if you don't know the seriousness of the situation.

Step 10: The police report can be used as evidence.

Contact the police if you are being followed by your ex.If you have to file for a protection order, you should get an official police report.The stalking behavior should be documented as thoroughly as possible.Copies of harassing emails, text messages, and social media posts can be saved.Since the user may remove them later, take a picture of things.If your ex shows up at your place of work, make a note of the day and time.If you need to take legal action against your ex, you should keep a record of all the times he harassed you.

Step 11: Get help from others.

It is important to let others know about the situation.Friends, family, and community organizations will understand if you feel embarrassed or scared to tell other people about a stalker.They can give you emotional support and a place to stay if you want to get away, as well as help you watch for any signs that your ex is trying to contact you.Let your HR representative or school counselor know if you are worried about your safety.Most companies have protocols in place to help protect you, such as offering a security person to escort you to your car or removing your ex from the premises if they show up.

Step 12: The situation is not your fault.

If your ex becomes a dangerous problem, it's not your fault because anyone can be a stalker.If you feel like you lead your ex on, contact the authorities for help.

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