It can be rewarding to help others change a behavior.You run the risk of losing the relationship if the person doesn't want your help.If a friend or loved one's pornography addiction causes him to neglect his relationships, work, school and other important things in life and he continues despite the negative consequences, then it is time to help.You can help someone manage a pornography addiction by using tactics to ignite action, shape new ways of thinking and foster a healthy life-balance.
Step 1: To start action, talk about the problem.
Someone with an addiction to pornography may have hidden it from others.The process of talking allows someone to let go of a lie.Talking can be used in many types of therapy.Allow the person to tell his story if he tells you he has an addiction.It is important for him that he is heard.If you notice a change in the person's behavior, you can bring it up by saying something like, "I've noticed you are spending a lot more time online, and you look like something is bothering you."Do you want to talk about it?Difficult subject matter can endanger a relationship.The root of addiction is Deceit.Do you think you're addicted to pornography?
Step 2: The person should be accountable.
When someone is interested in the outcome, people tend to rise to a challenge.When you can tell someone about your accomplishments, there is a tendency to believe in yourself.Results and effectiveness are increased by accountability.If a person isn't living up to expectations, you can call them out and be the person who asks to be updated.The person will be helped by a process that will help end bad behaviors.You can help the person be accountable by saying something like, "I want to help you with this so I'm going to check in with you and ask you how things are going."You have to make sure the person is committed to not deletion of his search histories.
Step 3: Shame and guilt can be avoided.
In most cultures, an addiction to pornography carries a sense of shame.If a person is trying to change his behavior, shame and guilt isn't helpful.Help the person find things that will change their behavior.When necessary, encourage a sense of right and wrong.Explain to him that he needs to separate himself from his behaviors.He is not a bad person but his actions cause harm.If the addiction has hurt his relationships, you can say, "Your relationships are going to be better once you change your behavior."It's going to be easier for you.A shame and guilt-filled statement would be to say, "Don't you want to stop messing up your relationships?"I am not sure why you would want to do that.It makes no sense and it hurts everyone.
Step 4: Help him with his self-monitoring system.
Learning a new set of behaviors is needed to end an old behavior.The goal of ending an addiction to pornography is to find ways to deal with negative feelings.An effective way to manage behavior change is through a structured approach.The target behavior should be identified.Talk about the behaviors the person would like to change.If the person stays up until 3:00 a.m. watching pornography and misses class or work in the morning, then he will need to change his sleeping schedule.Go to bed no later than 11:30 p.m. on weeknights.Help him choose a system to change his behavior.Setting schedules for limited time using the computer, scheduling time to do outdoor activities, and writing about his feelings in a journal are some of the things that may be included.If he is depressed, anxious, stressed or suffering from low self-esteem, introduce relaxation techniques like yoga, meditation, and breathing exercises that have all been successful in treating these disorders.Positive thoughts and behaviors can be reinforced.If he enjoys going to the movies or sporting events, these can be used as rewards.His self-esteem and belief in himself will be helped by this.As improvements occur, fade your involvement.As he accumulates more and more positive behavior, you can slowly reduce your involvement.
Step 5: Get him active.
Help pull the person away from the computer.The goal is to build an interest in the benefits of physical activity for the person.He's more likely to change if he feels better.Suggestions include walking, running, hiking and weight lifting.The activities help the brain release endorphins, which increases feelings of pleasure and reduces pain.You could suggest that he take a dance class.He can take a break from his addiction when he learns new dance steps.
Step 6: There are new interests to explore.
A person with an addiction is less likely to pursue his interests.It robs him of being able to experience things he enjoys and things that he might enjoy if he had the time.He should be encouraged to explore his interests by answering the questions "What is missing in your life?"If you could travel, where would you go?What would you do with no money?It could be that playing the guitar has been an interest.He should take a class online or in a local music store.Encourage him to join groups that share his interests.Close friends may result from these connections.Take a lot of time away from the addiction.There will be no time left to watch pornography if he spends most of his time on new activities.
Step 7: Ask a therapist to talk to you.
If his struggles are getting harder and the self-help strategies aren't making a big difference, then he should see a therapist.He might be dealing with depression, anxiety, and self-esteem issues that are too much to handle.A licensed therapist can help with these types of issues.The goal of the therapist is to provide a safe place to talk, express emotions and discuss the situation openly and honestly.It takes courage for him to make positive changes in his life.The therapist will speak to you.He needs help and talking to a therapist is the next step.It's time to talk to a professional after you've talked about his addiction.You can tell him, "I will be here for your, and you will have the therapist to talk to who will undoubtedly have better ways to help you."Ask your doctor, family member or trusted friend if they can recommend a therapist.There are therapists in your area who can help with addictions.Look for a therapist who does cognitive behavioral therapy.This type of therapy provides a step-by-step process to stop compulsive behavior and is used to treat addiction.The person will be helped by the therapist to get rid of negative thought patterns.There is a 12-step program for people who suffer from sexually related addictions.There are 12-step programs all over the world.You can get information on a meeting near you by contacting a local chapter.
Step 8: You should conduct an intervention.
Sometimes a more focused approach is needed when help comes in many forms.An intervention is a planned confrontation between friends and family to address an addiction.It is a difficult decision to make, but one that is necessary if the addiction has spiraled out of control and the person's life is in danger.Many people with an addiction are not willing to seek treatment.The intent of an intervention is not to put the person on the defensive.Those who will participate in the intervention should be carefully chosen.The addiction to pornography can affect the person's loved ones.A plan is needed to give the person treatment options.Inpatient programs, outpatient programs and counseling are involved in all.
Step 9: Provide emotional support.
If the person has been open with you about his addiction, you should focus on being supportive.It's difficult to admit you have a problem.If you want to help, you need to show that you can be trusted and not make fun of the person.The person will experience less stress if they have a good support system.It takes courage to admit you have a problem, so you can say, "First of all, thank you for telling me."I know it takes a lot of courage to do that.I can help you in any way.
Step 10: Show your feelings.
Personal growth is dependent on being listened to and understood.The emotional experience of dealing with a pornography addiction will force a person to grow, which may be painful.You can help alleviate the person's pain by listening.Put yourself in that person's shoes.Don't judge the person and be compassionate.There are resources that can teach you about being compassionate.You can always try to understand it.You should treat the person the same way you would want to be treated.You know what helped and what didn't in your life.
Step 11: He needs to identify his emotional issues.
Pornography can be used to manage unpleasant thoughts and feelings.Pornography can push feelings of depression, boredom, loneliness and stress away.This is only a temporary solution and doesn't create long-term effective ways of dealing with those feelings.Determine if the person is depressed.Screening questionnaires can help with the process.He might have been depressed before he became addicted to pornography.He may be trying to manage anxiety, loneliness, boredom and other emotions, so you can ask him, "Are there some things that you're depressed about?"Compulsive behaviors include cybersex or pornography addiction.The person is relatively anonymous, which allows him to continue his behavior.It's much harder to resist when you have unlimited access.Suggest that he may be using pornography to get away from his feelings.Make it clear that you are there to help him and that he needs help.Put a lock on his internet access if that's what it takes.
Step 12: The accomplishments are celebrated.
You need to acknowledge the person's progress if he shows signs of improvement.As time goes by, it may become larger celebrations.Congratulate the person if they share any positive news about him.He might say that he made it through the entire morning without looking at pornography.You could say, "That is awesome."You are moving in the right direction.You really want to do this?Keep going.
Step 13: You can only help so much.
It is difficult to help someone change their behavior.You can't control a lot of variables.You will not always be able to help someone.You will find success if you are able to let go of control and be a guide and support for the person.Consistency and reliability can be provided for the person.You are always there for him.You may need to remind the person that you are here for them.It is hard for me to see you struggle, and I wish I could do more.
Step 14: Take care of yourself.
You might live longer than most people if a person helps others.Helping others can take a toll on you, so make sure to stay physically and emotionally healthy.Get the proper amount of sleep that you need to avoid getting exhausted, and focus on the following things to ensure a healthy emotional balance for yourself.Good health and energy can be achieved by eating healthy food.You should include fruits and vegetables.Foods high in saturated fats should be avoided.It's a good idea to exercise regularly to manage stress.
Step 15: Continue to support us.
Text or call to see the person.Be positive in your interactions with the person, but be honest and serious when necessary.He needs to know that you will be with him on the road to recovery.Understand the person's struggle.You should treat others the way you would like to be treated.
Step 16: Real life interactions should be encouraged.
An addiction to pornography results in an unbalanced amount of time spent online.A person needs to engage in a balanced amount of human interactions if he wants to have meaningful relationships.There will be new people at the gatherings you invite him to.If he is uncomfortable in the beginning, be at his side to support him.There is a distorted view of human sexual interaction caused by pornography.He needs to be aware of the realities of sexual relations.Provide him with reliable and honest resources.
Step 17: You should plan and carry out healthy activities.
You should be in charge of coordinating fun activities that will benefit you and the other person.If you can have fun and help the person expand their view of the world, that's great.Casual hang-out events, vacations, and sporting events can be arranged.Encourage the person to join you if you want to experience something.
Step 18: Be the voice of reason.
Make sure that common sense prevails.If the person tries to negotiate with you about complying with his commitment to not watch pornography, then confront him.He might think he can watch a few minutes and be fine.He will keep going once he starts back up.It is a good idea to be reminded of consequences.You will have to tell him about the dark place that he came from.If he starts watching again, the hard work he did will be lost.Approach the conversation in a matter-of-fact tone and explain that this is not about guilting you into something.This is about the reality that you are living in.You have a responsibility to yourself and the people who care about you.If you see changes in his behavior that lead you to believe there might have been a slip-up, calmly confront the issue.You can tell me you look tired.Is everything okay?Do you not watch pornography?There is no reason to lie if you are not.
Step 19: Understand that there may be relapses.
You can find out by accident or the person will tell you.You have to help the person forgive himself, regroup and continue on the path of abstaining from pornography.He will most likely continue to feel safe sharing his thoughts and feelings if you are more open and willing.The person will not be able to create secrets that can undermine his progress.If a particularly difficult situation presents itself, help the person manage the temptation to view pornography.Suggest activities that will distract the person such as remote control airplane flying or rock climbing.Someone should be involved in something completely different.Encourage the person to forgive themselves if they make a mistake.It's important to deal with a setback.Help him focus on his goals.You can say something like, "You may have slipped up, but what is important now is that you focus on small steps to get back on the program."You will not do it in the next hour.If you stick to your plan, you will build momentum.You have to go back.Don't give up on yourself.