Sometimes having a private moment with someone you like and then blabbering on uncontrollably, like a nightmare, is the worst thing that can happen.You can prevent yourself from being a fool with a little patience and self-control.It's a good idea to practice a few calming techniques before you see them.Taking the initiative will help you over the next hurdle.Paying attention to your body as you talk will help you maintain control.
Step 1: Just breathe.
When you see your crush, focus on your breathing.Your lungs get less oxygen when you take quick, short breaths, which makes your heart speed up and your body tense up.Take deep, long breaths to calm your body and mind.Inhale through your nose and exhale.Imagine that your lungs are in your body.It is easier to practice on your own when your crush is around.
Step 2: You can make an "okay" sign with your fingers.
This may seem odd, but it is actually a yoga trick called the Gyan Mudra.Just like you would signal "okay" to someone, join the tip of your index finger and thumb to form an "O".Focus on the outside instead of the inside.If you want to focus on the feeling of your thumb and fingertips, just do it.It is possible to do this before you see that special person.If you think it looks odd, just hold your hands behind your back and hide it.
Step 3: Use music to relax.
If you can, listen to something that relaxes you before you see your crush.You can put calming music on your device.Songs that calm you down in the back of your head are usually the ones you play.The term "relaxing" refers to the fact that your body rhythms will fall in line with the music.If you play too exciting your body will get worked up.
Step 4: A little dancing.
You can get rid of your anxieties by dancing them out.If you don't mind busting a move in public, go for it, it's a proven way to relieve stress.Move your feet by taking a walk, stepping on and off a curb, or something similar.Depending on what type of music you like to dance to, this might seem to contradict the whole idea of relaxing music.Don't worry about that.Dancing will increase your blood flow and give you more oxygen, which will help you relax and feel better.The more active you are, the better!If you expect to run into your crush as the hour draws near, switch over to your relaxing music to get yourself settled.
Step 5: You should be confident in your looks.
Don't worry about the small flaws that you want to wish away.You don't need to worry about trying to fit in with your crush.You should dress the way you like to dress.You can style your hair how you please.It's up to you to own it.People are attracted to certain looks.People are more likely to respond to your level of confidence than your appearance.If you're a brunette or redhead who's worried that your crush only seems to date blondes, stop worrying!If you act confident in your own looks, they will be more impressed by your self-assurance than your hair color.
Step 6: Be bold.
You should start a conversation when you see your crush.You can show them how confident you are by going for it.If you give someone else the chance to swoop in and steal your attention, you will grow anxious.Just walk up and open up.Asking a question about something you share in common is similar to a class.I did not write them down and now I can't remember.They should use something to get the ball rolling, like the book they are reading: "You know, that one's been in my to-read pile forever."Is it worthwhile?
Step 7: They should be talking about themselves.
Keep the spotlight on them until you draw them into a conversation.Think of yourself as an interviewer and ask a lot of follow up questions.This will give you a chance to get to know them better, and will flatter their ego by showing that you are interested in what they think.Ask if they have read any of the author's books after you comment on the book they are reading.Which one would they recommend first?The book they recommend was turned into a movie.Which one did they like better?Let the conversation flow naturally from topic to topic, but keep the focus on what they think of that topic.If they really liked the movie adaptation because their favorite director made it, ask why they like that director.
Step 8: Look at them.
When you walk up to them, make eye contact with them.Keeping your attention on them is how you can show them that you are interested in what they have to say.They might think you're bored, distracted, or feeling defensive if you look away and stare at something else.That doesn't mean that you should stare at them without blinking.Take breaks.If you laugh, close your eyes or look away.Look at them if someone else shouts or zips by on a bike a few feet away.Bring your attention back to you immediately, just keep your breaks brief.When you first approach, don't forget to smile.They should be happy, too, if you show them that you are happy to be talking to them.
Step 9: Don't concentrate on them, you should.
The focus should be on what is happening outside of you.All of your attention should be on what your crush says.If you don't mind, you will only react to the conversation and not worry about it.Don't stand there empty-headed like a zombie.To quiet any thoughts that don't have anything to do with what the two of you are talking about, is the trick.If you worry about things that have nothing to do with it, you will make the conversation awkward.
Step 10: You can offer your own take on things.
Asking your crush lots of questions is a good way to get to know them, but you should start sharing your own thoughts as you get more comfortable with them.Don't make them think this is a police interrogation.The conversation should be equal as you go on.You are still talking about their favorite director and movies.Tell them why you love one of their favorite movies.If not, play the desert island game and ask which five movies they would bring with them to watch for the rest of their lives.Share your picks with the reasons why.Share your own answers after you ask them more questions.If all of their desert island picks are horror flicks, say, "You're really into horror, huh?" then share your own opinion on the genre.By being bold, asking lots of questions, and sharing your own answers, you can make them feel like the conversation is equal parts give and take.You can reveal what you want to share about yourself when you direct the course of the conversation.
Step 11: Keep it light.
You can make the conversation enjoyable by sticking to topics that you both enjoy.When the two of you are officially together, leave serious talks for the future.Show your crush that you are a fun person to talk to and keep the conversation going.Don't be negative.Say you don't like their favorite movie.Pick it apart, don't put them off.That doesn't mean you have to lie and say you loved it.Be honest, but not crazy.Leave it at that, if you couldn't get into it.You can use part of it as a starting point to speak positively about something.If you love an actor in a movie, say something like, "Oh, but you know what Tom Hardy movie I do love."There is a possibility that this is not the case..If you enjoy doing that, you can bond over the fact that you both think a movie is terrible.
Step 12: A positive frame of mind is needed.
Don't think that everything will go wrong.If you act like more of an idiot, that will increase your chances of self-fulfilling that destiny.Keep an open mind.Don't try to read too much into what your crush says.Unless they say, "I don't like you," take it easy on yourself.Everything will work out for the best if you go with the flow.If they seem withdrawn when you talk to them, give yourself a break.They could be tired, distracted or depressed.Don't worry about what goes wrong, focus on what works.If you made them laugh with a joke, remember that moment instead of dwelling on the fact that you stuttered a few times.A sense of humor is important.Don't beat yourself up if you act like an idiot.It will make you seem more confident if you can laugh at yourself.
Step 13: Don't focus on your body.
Don't worry about flaws.Everybody has something.Showing self-confidence through your body language is more important than hiding features.Fix yourself up and dress according to your own style, instead of trying to fit into a "type" that your crush might like better.People are more likely to respond to your self-confidence than your appearance.Focus on how you carry yourself instead of what your face and body look like.
Step 14: Stay still.
Don't act jumpy.Don't play with your hair, ear, or feet if you are nervous.Stand or sit, remain composed.When called for, only move.Don't act like you're ready to flee at the drop of a hat to show you own the room.Keeping both feet flat on the floor is the best way to keep your feet from bouncing.If you normally do that, use your hands to make gestures.If you can keep it to a minimum, your special someone won't be distracted by wild flailing.Focus on your breathing if you feel like some part of you must move.Take a deep breath and focus on how your chest rises and falls.
Step 15: Pay attention to your arms and hands.
You don't want to stick your hands in your pockets.Fight the urge to fight each other.Your crush might think these are signs of boredom.If you are sitting, fold your hands over your lap and keep your arms relaxed.Bring something to hold when you are talking to them.If you are on your way to the gym, this could be anything from a bag to a textbook.If you bring a prop, bring it with you.You might look like a disorganized mess if you juggle a bunch of random stuff.
Step 16: Keep your feet and legs in mind as well.
Don't hold yourself too tightly and resist the urge to fold in.If you want to show your confidence, set your feet apart from each other.You should aim your toes at your crush.Show them that your attention is focused on them.You shouldn't make the impression that you're ready to go somewhere else.If you are seated facing each other, do the same thing.If you are seated side by side, angle your feet towards them.If it feels more comfortable, cross an ankle over one knee.
Step 17: Good posture can be maintained.
Take care of your back, shoulders, and arms.It's a good idea to put your chest out a little.Try to keep your shoulders straight up to your ears.Whether you are sitting, standing still, or walking, stay relaxed, move slowly, and keep your back tall and proud.If you have bad posture in general, start working on it when you are alone, because the key is to come off as relaxed.If you force it, you may come across as stiff and cranky.If your crush is shorter than you, that's an exception.Feel free to hunch forward and bring your heads closer together.You will not come across as staring down your nose at them if you do this.