How To You should be different.

Being indifferent means being dispassionate.If you enjoy the show, you won't get caught up in drama and emotion.It would be great to sit back and watch as people all around you are involved in their own production.It's mind over matter.

Step 1: Get away from yourself.

That's two different words.Several "you"s exist at the same time.Like Freud's id, ego, and superego.For the first time, there's the "you" that behaves.Then there's a "you" that watches that behavior.There is a part of you that can step outside and look at things from a different point of view.Let's put it this way: There is the you that just does and is.The first "you" is like a baby within you.You eat, you breathe.You don't question it.You are reading right now.There is a person who is monitoring all this behavior, thinking, making sure it's socially acceptable, etc.Have you ever wondered why you ate 5 slices of pizza?That's the third you.The third "you" is more elusive.It can look at your behavior and come to conclusions.We'll be targeting you.You don't really feel things or need things, it just observes.It is indifferent.

Step 2: Think of life as a movie.

You need to think of life like a movie in order to target this third.You need to be less invested in what's happening.Emotions only skim the surface and don't have any real repercussions.What kind of movie are you watching right now?Who is in control?What will happen?You will start seeing patterns and thinking outside of the box if you get this thinking down.You are sitting at home and eating a bowl of cereals.What is your character feeling?Is that going to change in the coming days?It's a lot different to see an emotion than it is to feel it.

Step 3: It's no big deal.

Whatever it is.It's seriously.It is not a big deal.Few things are in the grand scheme of things.The collapse of the universe is a possibility.That seems large.Is it in the middle of your forehead?There is a question as to whether or not that comment made by Trang was malicious.Nope and no.These tiny things should not get any reaction or emotion from you.It's hard to be phased when nothing is significant.It's hard to be happy.It's a give and take.According to a recent study, those who believed that they had no purpose in life but didn't care are middle-of-the-road when it comes to happiness.While you won't care that your stupid scum of a boyfriend dumped you, you will still be sad when you get that job promotion.

Step 4: Don't be afraid to open your mind.

Leaving our assumptions, beliefs, pride, emotions, and vulnerabilities at the door is what being indifferent is about.Our minds have to be open in order to do that.Is it possible that your sexual orientation/gender/denomination/race is going to ruin you?Hmm.Interesting.Wonder why he thinks that?You should never be offended, angry, or defensive when reacting to your part.Staying rational and logical is difficult for many of us.When someone makes a personal attack on our belief system, we want to put that person in their place.Can't do that!You have to be willing to listen to your opinions on the matter.This person is good for them because they think differently from you.

Step 5: There is a process behind the content.

Think of them as their characters whenever you interact with them.Think of their background and why they are doing what they're doing.What do they mean by their words?Think of the process behind the content.Please give me attention when someone says, "Hey, ohmigosh, I really have something I want to tell you -- but I totally shouldn't."If you begged for the gossip, it would give me immense satisfaction.The process is still going on behind the content.Seeing behaviors for the process makes it easier to address what's actually going on, and to remove yourself from the situation at hand.

Step 6: Your facial expressions should be kept to a minimum.

It looks like you don't care one way or the other.It's important that you don't give away your feelings on your face.If you say, "Oh, that's slightly interesting," you will look like you're not paying attention.It's not about reacting negatively or positively.You're still alive and well.It's all about hearing or seeing something and taking it in calmly.When your sister's friend starts talking about her potato chip addiction, you have a similar reaction.Mild curiosity at best.

Step 7: Don't allow your body to give you away.

Now is the time to make sure your body matches what your face is saying.Most body language is about the body.If you scream "I couldn't care less" but your body makes you uncomfortable, you're no longer indifferent.At all times, you should be in a relaxed, open position.You're watching a good movie.You are comfortable and stress-free, even though you are still engaged.Hanging on them is not the way to mask your indifference if you're trying to convince your crush.

Step 8: Stay open and receptive.

It's easy to mistake too much indifference for being cold or negative.indifference is not about that!You don't care if people come to you to be welcomed or not, you're still open, welcoming, and receptive.If no one was in the room, you'd be doing the same thing.You don't have to close yourself off because you're an observer.If your significant other is yelling at you, keep your arms uncrossed and your legs unfolded.When you can get a word in edgewise calmly, you'll address this as a display of their need to control.You're still listening to what they have to say and putting it through an objective analysis.

Step 9: It's not a good idea to enjoy it too much.

Some of us want to be indifferent.We want to get back at an ex, prove to our parents that we don't care, etc.Don't enjoy it too much if this is your case.That will show you that your indifference is a facade.You've become a fake; you're no longer indifferent.

Step 10: You should be calm.

Since everything is no big deal and you're analyzing the process from afar, why wouldn't you be calm?You have nothing to lose in 99% of life's situations, so why waste your time?Whether it's a fight with a boyfriend or a deadline, lots of people get stressed out.You don't do that because they care about the outcome.If you find yourself in a stressed out situation, don't think about it.It will pass soon enough.

Step 11: Don't be angry.

Showing little emotion is important in addition to staying calm.Since '93, you're stress-free and never angry, sad, or overly happy.You don't have much reason to feel intense emotion because the situations around you are not phase you."You killed my fish!"Your reaction should be as if someone said, "I bought a new lamp today."That's nice.Maybe you don't know what color it is.If you feel like it, you'll ask.

Step 12: Be objective.

There are many opinions in the world.Everyone has them.Most people are willing to display them.You are not most people.You see both sides of the coin and analyze the situation for what it is.You have to see your side of the coin as well.It is possible to be aware of your own behavior when it is hard to see the forest through the trees.When you're fighting with a friend, look at what's driving her, but also what is driving you.

Step 13: The process needs to be addressed.

You don't have to respond to people's words when you're dealing with them.You have to respond to what they're saying.The process is more important than the content.It will help you to be objective.You won't be thinking about people's tendencies or complexes.Julia brought Pete a list of things to do.Julia gets upset when Pete doesn't do it.Julia thinks Pete is lazy and that he doesn't care about her.Julia needs to realize her own translation of Pete's behavior and that is just that Pete operates on, so Pete should be thinking about how that list is really Julia needing her life to be organized and her asking for his help to do this.They can solve the situation if they see themselves for how they are acting.

Step 14: You should give the courtesy to everyone.

You don't prefer one person over another if you're truly indifferent.It's like you're alone in the room.If you want to convince someone of your indifference, treat them like a stranger.When they walked away, you would definitely be civil, but you wouldn't respond if they talked to you.That's fine.This works on enemies as well.indifference is more powerful if you hate the person.They will not know what to do when you don't react.Don't be mean to them and kill them with kindness.